I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
