I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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