You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
