Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
