no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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