so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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