He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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