I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize