if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
you win again, gameday.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Randomize
