He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
