This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
