You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
I've blown a few things in my day
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
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