that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
