how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Randomize