The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
