It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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