Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Randomize
