..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
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