The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
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