you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
operation have a gay friend backfired
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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