You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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