the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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