perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize