It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy�
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Randomize
