He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
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