Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
