8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
We smell like vodka and hangover
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