yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
