Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
