Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
