that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Randomize
