I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Randomize
