they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
