I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
this boner is exhausting
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
