forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
