is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
