Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
