so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize