would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
