is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
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