just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
But I just had this pork p�t�. It was dick grabbing.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
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