I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Randomize
