Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Randomize
