You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
