Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
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