i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
