omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize
