Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
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