i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
