thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
